Am I Emascualted?

 

We were so vastly different from each other in every way. Daddy was tall, muscular, hairy, confident, strong in mind, character as well as in physical strength. He made all of our decisions for us. When he walked into a room people noticed him immediately because of his personality, his charm, his whit and his gorgeous good looks. As his boi-wife i was shorter than he was, I was on the thin feminine side when it came to my build, I was completely hairless from the waist down per Daddy's request. I needed guidance knowing I made the right decisions when I was given the opportunity to make any, my mind was more womanly in many ways and most of my decisions involved how and in what ways I could make Daddy happy. People rarely noticed me when I walked into a room and when they did I was always referenced to as his wife. One day at a small party we held, that I handled every last single detail a new co-worker of Daddy's, a man asked me "Was I emasculated by being called his wife?"

 I responded by saying, "Well we are legally married. I changed my last name to his. I serve in my role as his wife and all of those Stepford Wife's 1950's housewife roles and attitudes, including in the bedroom. Daddy refers to me as his "baby girl" and I accept, and embrace that role thoroughly and love it. So no I'm not emasculated. You can't do that to somebody who was never masculine in the first place." The poor man didn't know what to say, and wondered off back into the throng of people. Just as confused as before.

Later that night getting slowing undressed Daddy approached me in the bedroom. "Baby girl I learned what you said tonight to my new co-worker and I couldn't be prouder and happier in you as my wife than I am tonight. He hugged me tightly and my unbuttoned shirt. We slowly began undressing and often looked at each other as each garment came off. It didn't take much for me to take off. My men's shirt and slacks and I stood there in just my thigh highs and garter belt with my hose clipped into place, my chastity locked clitty was on full display.

"You've never looked more beautiful than you have tonight, baby girl."

"Thank you Daddy so much. It means so much to me to hear you say that. And seeing you standing there fully naked you've been so masculine and rugged looking. I truly love you with all my heart Daddy."

"I love you to baby girl. You ready to give Daddy some pussy?"

"I'm always ready to go pussy up for you Daddy. You know that."

"Why don't you go over to the bed and get in my favorite position, princess." 

That meant getting on the bed on all fours. My ass high in the air. My legs spread as wide as they would go. My back was arched impossibly high with my hairless cunt on display. My head was on the bed and my hands were in front of me. In the BDSM world it's known as bitch pose and Daddy always said I was prettiest just like that. He walked over to the side of the bed and closest to where my head was at. I didn't need told what to do, I knew. I swallowed his semi-erect dick in my mouth to the balls, and began sucking him to full staff.

"God fucking damn princess, you are so good at sucking cock. Damn baby. Get Daddy nice and hard."

Daddy's hands gently held my head, cradling my chin gently in his hands I suck him like some two bit starving whore. Every time my lips met his crotch I stuck out his tongue and lapped his balls which were cradled in my right hand. He spit in his hand a few times and then rubbed his spit in my twat and began finger me with two fingers bashing my princess spot with each thrust.

"Mmmrrppphhggrrr," was all I could manage with mouth stuffed full of dick. By now Daddy had add a third finger and this time around all of his fingers were covered in Boy Butter Lube. I was moaning my head off.

"You ready for dick, Mrs. Bartley?" Daddy always called me that in moments of deepest affection.

"Yes Daddy. Always ready. Always needy."

Daddy climbed up on the bed behind me, his knees between my legs and his mushroom head of dick as at the very edge of pussy lips teasing me by making the smallest circles possible around my pussy lips.

"Please Daddy, the teasing is brutally wonderful, but please fuck me."

"No baby girl. No wild animalistic sex tonight. Daddy is going to reward you tonight by the slowest, most tender love making we've ever had as your reward for such an incredible answer to Mr. Johnson's question."

He turned me on my side and with his right hand he arched my right leg up till it was bent, exposing my lil pink pussy again. He then bent down and proceeded to eat me out till I was begging him to please feed my pussy his dick. He waited though, still devouring my spit soaked cunt til he was ready and I was in such bliss it was overkill. My twat was actually aching in need to be stretched and more than just a tongue. That's when he moved behind me, lying down and very, very slowly slide his dick into my pussy. 

"Oh GOD, thank you so much for your big dick finally Daddy. It's absolutely starving." Centimeter by centimeter he unhurriedly slide into me until after what seemed for ever he was buried balls deep and my pussy walls were gloriously stretched and full of Daddy's manhood. He began slowly rocking in and out of me but no more than half way for the next twenty minutes. It was splendidly unbelievable how tender and passionate it was. There was no hurry for him to ejaculate and but he had caused a few triumphant pussygasms, causing me to get sopping wet.

He began to build up slowly over the next twenty a bit of speed, but it certainly his balls slapping my taint. This was simply all about giving my pussy the most stimulation, pleasure and gentle stretching ever.

"Oh god baby girl. You ready for some baby batter deep in your womb?

"OH fuck yeah Daddy. Breed my pussy. Please, please, please breed my pussy."

"Maybe tonight's the night you finally get pregnant if I shoot inside of you."

"God I want that so bad Daddy." He buried his cum so deep in me it felt unreal. Our breath was heaving and Daddy's arm wrapped around my waist."

"I love you Mrs. Bartley."

"I love you too Mr. Bartley

Acceptance, Self love; tips, memes and my thoughts

This morning I woke up thinking about acceptance. Our acceptance or ourselves. I think that is where it all begins, and everything else follows. So, I'll admit I sleep bottomless. Just a t-shirt nothing else, my shoulders get chilly. Have slept that way since I was about fourteen, couldn't stand the confinement. Anyway, the last year since seeing the @BigCMen and @DevinFranco Pornhub vid, where Daddy Cory calls Devin pussy---which I wrote about here... I wake up every morning, first thing; I open my legs wide, reach down between them and pet, pat and lightly spank my pussy and verbally say, "I love my pussy, thank you for being my pussy."

Sometimes, dig out my dildo and poppers and start the day with some "wreckage". A friend last year, during the height of COVID-19 and my four and a half month self isolation suggested this tip too, which I did every day. Three times a day actually:

Strip naked, get on all fours in bitch pose. Pussy up, legs spread wide, back arched, head on the floor and say, "I am pussy and I LOVE myself being pussy." He recommended saying it fifty times in a row, like chanting and I have a string of Hindu prayer beads that I used to keep track of how many times I was saying it.

You can take this a step further, which is what I did and while riding your favorite dildo say "your mantra". Same amount of times or more. Riding a dildo I would say it every single thrust in and out. In my thinking this cemented my place, even though I had 98% bottomed since day one, first sexual experience right out the gate. Of course after hearing the term Daddy Cory used, I stumbled accidentally on the term pussyboy and as a writer, my research went into overkill. I HAD to understand this thinking. HAD to! Once I did, as Ms. Cracker says, "Shabbat, shablam" it all made sense. I had been that all my life and didn't fully know the term or when it become vogue. The mantra's just cleared the way for my full acceptance. Fem terms are the only ones I use now, for me it is WHO I am. It makes sense to me. It's how I view myself. I write this blog and do what I do on Twitter as I want and feel the need to help others, that's my Daddy side.

I want to celebrate, empower, rejoice in and help others like me to, "Live their best bottom life" or better yet, "Their best pussy life." There never needs to be shame, or guilt, or fear, or doubt or dread. NONE of it, do you hear me! This is my Daddy side kicking in here.

 

Rough Sex: Memes & gif

Think I woke this morning thinking about "rough" sex. Lucky me, luckier you, huh? So first is a short storied gif for you way TOO hot for Twitter. The kind of stuff that got me suspended, twice. The memes today are also rough in nature. I adore rough sex! There I said it! I feel better. Besides, I've HAVE always said, two things: 

1. "A sore pussy is a happy pussy" 

2: If your pussy isn't sore when he's done, he hasn't done it right. 

The other thing so many of us as pussyboy's love a good stretching it, it's why we're pussy to begin with! I'm going to say this too, might be controversial, BUT if you're going ass up every time you have sex, and your doing it often.... your his pussy. You might not think that way yet, may never think that way or even acknowledge it but your serving him that way! Period. You're the one getting fucked. And let's face it, pussy gets fucked! Tada! Above all else though, and I've written about it here being pussy is a mind set, much like the faggot mind set. Which I will post more on later.... promise.

 

The fuck- boy hadn't wanted to go on an assignment with more than two MEN, but his Daddy had insisted. "They're all riled up and they want your cunt, it's going to be over soon," he'd said. Turns out, it wasn't. One of the men had trouble ejaculating & breeding, and he wanted to use the opportunity to fuck your pussy as hard as possible to remedy that. Half an hour in, the fuck-boy was already howling in pain, and his pussy was beyond sore as fuck, but the frustrated man was no closer to orgasm or breeding you. As the fuck-boy tried to get away, the man's friends held him down. He felt like he couldn't take this any second longer, much less be fucked by the other dicks afterwards. Doesn't look like the other men are going to have any mercy though on his poor sore cunt, the howling has only gotten them harder.

this one, I actually found online

this was found online, too. I just want to be honest..

Now, go be a good boi, and go play in your pussy. Just no dicklet touching. That will get you in trouble.

 

Today's Meme's & thoughts

So, I'm loving this idea of sharing the memes that got me banned on Twitter. I'm hoping this drawers readers, followers and comments as I'd love to hear from you. If you were reading before my Twitter suspensions then you know that I'm a pussyboy, and am pussy for MEN. I fully accept it. Revel in it. 

 

Tips to further bring out the dominant side of myself to be a better Dom/Daddy.

 Do have any tips to further bring out the dominant side to be better for the bottoms I have in the future?

Boy, do I. Like many gay men, I knew very early one I was "different". Being born in November of 1966, I was at the cusp of the very gay liberation movement, and being gay was something fairly new to the mass public, and so was the pride so many felt in being such. I grew up in a very rural, very small town in Northeast Ohio that in 2010 had a population of 2,801--- mostly very conservative, or Amish & Mennonite. Gay was not a thing where I grew up. There were no role models, and the ones on television in the 1970's were mostly negative. I didn't even hear the word gay until I was 14 years old, when I was being bullied for being "assumed" as one---- "the faggot, fairy, and queer". That term, faggot, for nearly all of us, within the LGBTQIA+ community carries very deep, very painful memories and many of us hate the word to this day.  

Others though like myself began to embrace the term "faggot" in the 1980's with the creation of Queer Nation, a very vocal activist group pre-ACT UP demanding our rights as queers/faggots. Taking a negative word and making it positive. Which many communities across many backgrounds have done.

        A.  I bring all this up because I see myself as a faggot, and in my mind there is a difference in being gay and being a faggot. Faggot means, for me, not the norm socially, morally, spiritually and sexually. Especially sexually speaking for the purpose of this post. Faggot, for me means, not necessarily being built to to have a long relationship with another man, although I've been in two of them--- and certainly not a strictly monogamous long term relationship with a man. Neither of mine has been from my point and without "my husband" knowing of my infidelities. My being, as a faggot, revolves around being of sexual service to MEN plural. The more men, the happier I find myself. It's just how I work. Yes, my heart still loves, and would I leave----no, but I also understand my needs. Being a faggot, for me, means being a slut cum dump. In those moments, having a dick up my boy-pussy is when I'm FULLY alive and only then. 

At ten though I knew already I was attracted to guys. 

I bring this up because, I at even ten, and a virgin, KNEW I was submissive in nature. I grew up with a verbally, emotionally, & physically abusive father, and as a mama's boy, and around very emotionally strong, yet abused women. That this behavior was what was normal & to be expected. Walking on eggshells, if you will, your entire life. Wanting his approval, never getting it, or even a fraction of it. I  knew at fourteen, that when, or if, I ever had sex it had to be with a man, and I WAS going to bottom for him---- it didn't happen till I was eighteen, and I was very fortunate that he was so loving and caring in the process he became my lover, which I write about on this blog. He was older than I was, he came out at 16 in 1950 in Brooklyn, NY to his Orthodox Jewish family who disowned him and threw him into the streets. 

He was where I got my initial thoughts on what to expect from a dom/daddy. He was my "Daddy", and even though he died in 1988--- I still see him as my Daddy. Years later, I'd have the chance to have a second "Daddy", even though we never acknowledged that role or used that term. But he cemented my ideas, after a 10 year relationship on what truly the term means for me. Hopefully, this resonates with you.

1. The term "Daddy/Dom" for me means, of far greater worth or value than myself. 

That might sound odd at first, and I'm not saying I'm less than by any means; but what I am saying is he is the things I strive to be, but know in my depths I never can be, and especially without him present in my life. There's this idea that we submissive's are seen as "pathetic" or "losers" or even as "weaker"; but that's nonsense in my opinion.  There are just things we know we can't be, or do; it's part of our very genetic make-up, if you will. We might be male, but many of us, especially myself do not see ourselves as men. No matter how I old I get, I'm still just a boy. A state of growing, learning, accepting, needing approval. And for me that's ok. It works for me. 

            A. Some of us don't even see yourselves as boys, myself included, not quite girls either in some ways, but we see ourselves as only our pussies. Notice I said pussy here, not asshole; for we don't see ourselves as having an asshole, but having a pussy. See my post on being a pussyboy for more. Not every bottom guy though see's himself as being pussy. Being pussy is, in my thinking, more submissive in nature, more passive, we crave/long and thrive in getting fucked, we strive to please a bit more, and some of us are a bit more "feminine" in nature and thinking. For me it's not a kink or a fetish it is WHO I am. Being his gurl, is who I am and I want to be the best damn gurl for him I can be. Being his gurl, is how identify, and for me it does mean a bit feminine, but not all girlie-boys are that by any means. I've seen many a jock-type call himself Daddy's girl, and I find that very erotic. 

2. We accepted, not chose, that we are submissive. 

I never dated girls in high school, never kissed a girl other than my mother, grandmothers or aunts, never saw one naked till I was 26 yrs. old--- but that's a story for another time. I knew I never would marry a girl, or never had ANY desire in the least to have sex with a girl. I knew things were going to be very different for me, and leaving podunk nowhere was my key to that life. My first sexual intercourse with a man, when I was "cunted" (which I write about this term too on my blog in other posts) cemented my thoughts and that I was right in wanting to be a bottom gay guy. I desperately needed approval, of any kind, from a man---and by god my getting fucked by them in my mind said they not only approved of me, but wanted me sexually, even if just was that one fuck. It only needed to be once; their fucking me and yes, their breeding me was their stamp of approval especially the breeding part. His breeding me, in my thinking, was he thoroughly enjoyed my pussy, that it went beyond meeting his needs, and his breeding me was his thank you.

Acceptance of myself as a submissive faggot cum-dump didn't come easily, but once it did the floodgates opened, and I dove into the deep end of gay sex, and gay sex clubs, and orgies. Acceptance, brought out my inner whore, and my first lover encouraged me to be that whore, thankfully. By the time I was twenty-one I had been fucked by over 400 guys. But acceptance brought new awareness to: that I loved anonymous sex. That anonymous sex with complete strangers fulfilled me in ways, other gay sex couldn't. That random men in gay sex clubs not only found me attractive, but wanted to fuck me, and in their anonymity approved of me by fucking me. That being naked, ass up in a room, in a sex club, I could draw a man into my room gave me confidence I never have and still does. Hopefully this makes sense for you the reader. I could write about this more at length, but I see it as a different post.

        A. For the most part, as submissive's we choose who we serve, how we serve, as well as why. Can we serve YOU fully with out you understanding our submissiveness and going along with it, can being dominate really work if we are not into it? Not in my opinion, because it's a give and take process. Without us giving our submissiveness and without you understanding what we are giving and why, the whole thing just kind of dies. With that said, I think most good dominates know this, as well as appreciate it and us. Most dominates also try to build us up in ways that encourage us and reinforce for us that we can be even more submissive to them---beyond going ass up. For many of us, myself included, it is way more than just being fucked. Any bottom guy can get fucked, but once again not every bottom is submissive. Being submissive for us fulfilling and rewarding. Being submissive for HIM can involve many things, and that in itself should be a separate post.

3. Being a good dominate/Daddy also means, in the long haul: a shoulder to cry on when we need it, a teacher to broaden our thinking, as well as bring us into being fully ourselves, a role model of what it means to be "a man" in a world that sees that role vastly different than we do, a father figure in our moments of turmoil, a disciplinarian when it is required, a lover in our moments of loneliness or sadness, our council when we need advice or input, and a good sex partner. Being a dominate/Daddy also means caring, loving, affirmative, passionate, compassionate, being emotive, communicative, adventurous and supportive. Being a dom/Daddy is way more than sex. 

        A. Having other doms/Daddy's as friends and role models I think is a great idea especially for beginners as they can be the ones you can turn to in moments of uncertainty of what, how, or even why you should react they way you do versus what could be expected. I think there are certain stereotypes of dom/Daddies that are viewed as negative, in nature, and I think those moments are the rare exceptions and not the norm--- especially in BDSM scenes.

4. A good dom/Daddy is and understands the key to good communication. He fully listens, by that I mean he's not thinking, while your talking, of what he is going to say next but is invested in every word you say. But communication is also much more than just verbal. It is being able to understand eye contact, body language and silent cues that so many people today miss because they are not full invested in anything let alone another person. How can a good dom/Daddy know that he is fucking you right? Non-communicative language here is the key. A BDSM scene is going well, non-communicative language and spoken words. You get the idea, hopefully. It's also a process that doesn't happen overnight and takes real work for both parties. I'd add in here the use of "safe words", that the action/actions have gone awry and aren't working, you say that word and the dom/Daddy knows to stop instantly.

5. A good dom/Daddy is sexually adventurous, and helps his boy/sub see that it can broaden their sex play. From piss play, bondage, flogging, fisting, exhibitionism, cuckolds and beyond. The world of gay male sex is to be explored. Is everything for every one, No it's not, but you may never know if you aren't willing to try. Granted we all have our boundaries of things we will never do, and that does need to be acknowledged. Besides, plain ole vanilla sex gets boring quickly.

Finally I think that being a good dom/Daddy or a good sub/boy requires the other party, you got to have each other, to really make it work. Like any good relationship it takes real effort, and doesn't just happen. I hope my tips helped and if you have any you'd like to see added just let me know and I'll be happy to revise the post.

the dichotomy of boipussy vs. boycunt

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I’m struggling to know if I’m a pussyboy/fag. Any advice on how to know and next steps?

 

I'd first start by reading my post on gay bottom virgins as there is insight there that might help, but somehow I feel this question is VERY different from than that of being a virgin, for some reason. Maybe my "Daddy" inkling tendencies are kicking in here.

I knew very early on, like 5 or 6 that I knew I was very different than other boys my age, growing up in a very strict Christian fundamentalist home didn't help, and the time frame 1971-1972 of my being that age didn't help as the gay liberation movement was still very new, and with very little gay "role models" on tv, and what was on tv was negative and made fun of us. The language came, for me, at 13 when the teasing, bullying, name calling in high school and even then I was, "Oh that is what that is." I'm one of those gay men that never dated girls, never kissed one besides my mom, granny, & aunts. Certainly never had sex with any girl & had absolutely no desire to either. NONE!

I'm also one of those gay men that started playing with my ass very early, versus jerking off. Like extra time soaping it in the shower, fingering it, rubbing it. The neighbor boy my age we'd play show me yours, I'll show you mine but it was our asses not our cocks. Fingering it initially came, by pushing the soap into me as I bathed, rubbing plastic bottles against it.... the list goes on. About 15 I knew my first time having sex was going to be with a guy, and I knew I was going to bottom. That's my first point.

1. Decide your going to bottom. 

        I also knew at 15, even never having sex with a guy that all I wanted to do was bottom. It was my mind set, if you will. I know a tender age to decide you're going to pussy, but it's the truth. As I've said in previous posts I waited till I was 18 till I had sex with a guy, who ended up my lover for almost 3 years.  I never topped him. He was kind, patient, tender, slow, passionate and everything I needed that first time.

It's all about mind set. You know already you're attracted to guys, maybe even certain "types" of guys. The type that makes you hornier than all get out. Mind set and acceptance of who as well as what you are in imperative. But beyond that is how you go about doing it. As I said in my personal history it was a process, a slow one for me and until March of 2020 after seeing a gay video on Pornhub where the bottom was called pussy, I didn't know the term pussyboy existed. Back in my day it was power bottom. That was enough, and henny I was a big ole power bottom.

2. NEVER feel shame for being gay, or being a pussyboy, or being a fag. EVER! Acceptance for being gay has exploded for the most part; however, with that said despite our strides ---even in our very own community--- bottom shaming runs rampant. We are seen as less than, weaker than, not equal too blah, blah, blah, blah. I say horse shit! Without bottoms tops are just wanking off, period. But also in this thinking. we can't be full bottoms with out tops. So there we are. Take pride in being a bottom, or even a pussyboy, read my posts on being a pussyboy as there is a difference.

Being pussy, however, I think is the full embracement of the idea of being submissive, passive, pleasing. The idea of we thrive, blossom, grow when we are getting fucked--- or in some circles the term is cunted. It's acknowledging that for many of us we don't feel or full selves without being of use to another men in sex or even servitude, like making our man breakfast. It's embracing a feminine or even non-gendered language above and beyond a cold, clinical one: asshole, hole, rectum for ----pussy, cunt, snatch, twat, and mangina (which I hate by the way)--- which in my opinion can be either gender or neither--- and possibly adding boy or man to them-- boycunt, as an example.

Being pussy also implies that your pussy is your TRUE sex organ, and not your dick like every man that walks the planet. That it is ONLY your pussy that brings you bliss, joy, relief, calm, happiness and yes even fulfillment. Your (prostate orgasms or full body orgasms) or as I call em pussygasms, others call them fagasm's are enough, and that "ruined orgasms", or dribbling, or completely hands free ejaculations are enough.

3. Use your "new" language while having sex. Simple enough, right? Nope, not that easy I was terrfied out of my mind using, "Fuck my pussy" the first time with a random top I didn't know in the least. Thank goddess he was into it. I was very nervous saying it. As I mentioned in point 2 I NEVER use anything but "fem" terms to describe what I have. It does get easier the more you say them. My tip here is if your in dating apps state your a pussyboy, those knowledgable will know to use that language.

4. Might sound silly, but find a core group of other pussyboys---- your sisters, if you will---- for friendship, support, encouragement, advice, tips, tricks of trade, to gossip with, share tops with; and believe this or not some of us adore playing with others like ourselves---- because the sessions can be completely hot as we know truly know what to do to ourselves or even others to make pussy happy. Try it you might like it. They can help in shaving to if that's your thing, or just have some fun with true kindred spirits. 

5. Might seem like a no brainer, but here it goes.... play with your pussy and often! I can't tell you the number of bottoms I talk to on Twitter who don't own a dildo or pussy plug. It's baffling. At this point you know your pussy. You identify that way. Why aren't you playing in it? There's this idea that tops/Daddies love loose pussy. It's true! They want a pussy they can rut in, plow stupid, and fuck silly, A tight pink hole of a pussy would faint in fright at the mere thought of such treatment. And with COVID-19, and so many self-isolating for many reasons, it presents the perfect time to get that dildo out, grease your pussy, and stretch it so when you want screwed senseless you can take it. See more in my advice to virgin pussyboys.

6. Finally, be proud of who you are at every level, for this is how you were made. Plain and simple. No living in fear, shame, regret, doubt or anything else. We get one life. Enjoy it. To the best of your ability live authentically. Other people don't like it so fucking what. It's their issue on yours!