So, I've had my share here lately with gay/bisexual/curious/down low/married guys who want or feel the need to bottom but are virgins, with either none to little experience. So I thought as someone who is nearing fifty four years old (November 16th, 2020 if your curious) and who has been bottoming since he was eighteen that I have sage advice for those in this situation.
1. As I've said before in other posts in the past, I knew that my very first sexual experience was going to be with a man, and that I was going to bottom that first time; even though I never had anything more than just my fingers in my ass up until that first time. I was very lucky my first time. He was patient, kind, tender, loving, attentive and made the entire experience enjoyable, pleasurable with as little pain as possible. That was a feat into itself as he was 9 cut inches. However, not everyone will or can have the experience I had that first time. I wish they could.
With that all said, my first bit of advice is to buy yourself a life sized, or slightly smaller dildo. Can be even something from somewhere like Ambiance or an adult bookstore if you're fortunate to have one in your area. Don't spend the big bucks yet on a dildo, in my opinion, that will come. I say buy yourself a dildo because YOU fully control the ENTIRE scene: how much you take into yourself, the speed, the thrusting action or lack thereof with your dildo acting more like butt-plug, the length of time you use it and anything else you can possibly think of when it comes to being fucked my a real dick. Of course the only thing missing is that dildo cumming in you, but you could rub, or even fuck some of your own semen into yourself to get used to that feeling as well. The options here are endless.
With your dildo, I would set time aside for "exercises", meaning bluntly opening yourself up anally so if your first top decides to pound you stupid you can take it without feeling like you're dying from being ripped open. I'd practice thrusts: depth, frequency, speed, length of time, rotating it in--- you get the idea hopefully; which is trying to mimic an actual man fucking you. Start out slow to get used to it, build up speed, length of time you "workout", depth and yes even how many times a week you use your dildo. Listen to your body, your needs and listen most importantly (in my opinion) to the budding voice of your "pussy". You could add into this one the use of butt plugs, and the same ideas apply, with the addition of wearing it during your day for any length of time including extended wear i.e. like four hours or more. The more you use your "budding pussy" the more you'll be ready for that first real dick in you.
2. A silly as this may sound, and it may; get used to sleeping with no bottoms on AT ALL. Basically nude from at least waist down. I've done this since I was like thirteen because I liked the feeling. After that first time of my being fucked though, and him becoming my lover I instantly KNEW he HAD to have full, unimpeded access to my "budding pussy" as I slept. A lot, if not all tops love this idea. My guy used to love falling asleep with his dick buried in me after fucking me, and I grew to love it and needed it to sleep. He was also the type to fuck me in the middle of the night, or wake me up rimming me wildly first thing in the morning. This one in my opinion is an easy one. You get cold add a blanket, or two or even flannel sheets which I'm partial too all year round. This also gives you, even being single, that if you wake up in the middle of the night to say roll over; you have the wonderful opportunity of gliding your fingers over your "budding pussy" and playing in it which I do a lot.
3. Shower shots/enemas. Get used to them. Buy them, either the disposable Fleet Enemas, the red enema bag like your Grandma may have used, or the handy Shower shot attachment to your shower head. Going to be very blunt here, by saying nobody/ or very, very, very few guys like fucking an ass that is not clear/clean of shit. Period. For huge numbers of tops it's a HUGE turnoff. A clean "budding pussy" is a happy one. Luke warm water, till the water runs absolutely clear. Hot water physicians warn IS NOT ever recommended. Use the toilet to dispel the water and preferably not your shower, at least in the very beginning, as believe it or not you could end up clogging up your shower pipes. Once "larger" debris is expelled it is ok to use the shower. Many also find using the enema bag or shower shot as an additional way of opening up your "anal cavity/pussy" and over time some bottoms, believe it or not dribble precum "cleaning out", myself included. Many also see it as a bit of foreplay as it can relax your pussy muscles.
Going to add here even if it's not enema related the importance of diet and being a good "budding pussy." Lots of fruits, vegetables and of course fiber or fiber supplements. All of which helps keep one clean as well. Eating meat products especially, sit a lengthy time in the stomach/bowels and many bottoms refuse to eat meat products days before a sexual trysts so cleaning out is easier.
4. Being hairless. While not a necessity I've discussed in a previous post ways to remove hair if you wish to do so, however there are oodles of guys who love a fuzzy guy. It's all a matter of taste for you and them as well. So don't fret this one, and see my post on hair removal if it's your thing.
5. Language. This one might seems stupid, but for me since March of 2020 it has been the very cornerstone of my thinking as a pussyboy. I've fully & wonderfully embraced the power of language when it comes to my body parts. I don't ever use medical jargon, or even standardized jargon for what I have any more. Meaning I only use "feminine" terms: pussy, cunt, snatch, gash although it ends there as I hate using mangina ---- and dicklet, nub, or even clit for what's up front. Might seem of no importance to many, but for me it empowers me to focus on my one true sex organ my pussy and who as well as what I am at my core. I use these terms because I'm fully submissive, passive, adore getting fucked senseless and yes even bred. I feel as if it's an innate part of my identity and without it I'm not much of anything. Being pussy is part of my DNA, my soul, and to a huge degree even my very own gender: they/them, girlie-boy/faggot, pussy if your curious. It took years of bottoming to get to this point, lots of research into the term & thinking of pussyboys, soul searching, and yes even acceptance to get to this point. But, I've never been happier. You might want to seriously think about this one.
6. Condoms/PREP/bareback sex. First I want to say there is this move to not use the term "bareback" sex anymore and instead use "natural sex" or just "sex". The term simply came about because of the advent of HIV/AIDS and sex without condoms, and those wishing to change the language partially wish to do so because HIV/AIDS has become a life-time, chronic, manageable disease. July 16th, 2021 I'll have lived 30 years with AIDS myself so I understand the switch. For me the language is not of importance but your decision if you participate in condomless sex or not. You need to have an open, brutally honest conversation with your tops about both of your sexual histories if your worried about STD's. Know that person is being honest or go on PREP to prevent HIV/AIDS. I'm not going to discuss someone trying to "get HIV/AIDS" or bugchasing as it is called here that might be another post. The decision of using or not using condoms is yours, and don't be forced into something you don't wish to do.
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