Opening My relationship Question

Hey I was referred by a daddy with a similar account as yours to see if you could help me find a way to express to my boyfriend on wanting to get fisted and also gang banged because I feel that can really shake things up. For myself my boyfriend has not been open to fisting me, and he is not open to allowing us to do a threesome or have me open our relationship sexually. All of which I am okay to respect as it doesn’t damage our relationship but I would love to explore these areas with him.

Thank you in advance for your time. thanks for reaching out. I do appreciate it. 

 

First I've really got to say that I love when followers ask me questions. I think it shakes up the blog from being just stories that I write inspired by gifs or pics I find. it also gives me an opportunity to try to help guys out with whatever they are struggling with. SO.......

I think I would try to find out why why your boyfriend is not open to fisting you (I'll answer the threesome question in a bit as I feel it is a different issue). Is it some psychological hang up he has? Or is it maybe some "moral" issue that is standing in the way? Let's hope it's not a physical hang up, because in my opinion that could be the worst case scenario.

I say that because it seems a decent amount of men are turned off by the very idea of fisting someone. turned off on the idea of giving a man a fist up his ass is seen as repulsive and there are many reasons for that include: something that big, as a fist, doesn't belong in a "boi's" ass. That after the fist is out, if it even happens in the first place, that the boi's pussy is gaping open... as it should JMO..... and that the image of the gape or even prolapse is seen as repulsive. That over time of being fisted that you'll be so lax you'll require diapers... or even worse this idea that you could/would be far too loose for a decent fuck.

There's a lot to unravel here, and a lot of it I think is how HE thinks about it. find that out first. Then go fro there. The one issue in the previous paragraph I do want to deal with is this "urban myth", if you will, that you'll be far to loose after too much fisting. Let's be real here for a minute. Those few hours after fisting you may feel loose but the "male pussy" is resilient in my opinion and snaps back fairly easily. In the nearly 4o years I've been openly gay I've never met anyone into fisting who was to the point where they were in diapers. A lil loose maybe, but... again just my opinion here.... most "Daddy's" like a lax pussy so they can rut away.  If he won't budge on fisting you, you could always join a fisting group or even start one. Which I guess leads into the next question about threesomes.

Threesomes are incredible, in my opinion. It feels like you're at the very highest of your service that you can offer. Some people adore the idea of threesomes, while others imply hate them. Again find out his reasons why: is it because he's happy with things they way are they are? Is he the jealous type and doesn't want anyone else fucking you? Is it fear of sexually transmitted diseases especially if it's anonymous threesomes that you are having? Is it fear he will lose you to some one else? Or could it be he may feel like the other guy could be a better "top" then he is...or even more hung?  I know some of this sounds as insecurity and maybe it is...

Some relationships are monogamous, and for them it works. While for others that doesn't work at all. Find out the real reasons behind this than go from there. Some would say, have your threesome's but not involving him... which means cheating. Again for some people cheating works and it's no big deal. For others cheating is deal breaker. If you go the cheating route my best advice there is to keep quiet (all the ay around) about what you're doing with others. Being tight lipped can pay off. But cheating is a personal decision and something anyone else can answer for you. You have to do that on your own.

As I've said before have these brutal and difficult talks. it could open things up and give you better understanding both positively or negatively. Each requiring a different response. And I think it is your response to what you learn is the key issue here. Compromise maybe involved and... most relationships are to a degree... again for some it's finding ways to still get what you "need" and not Destry what you have while others may feel a bigger risk is worth it in the end to get what you need.

I'd also explore your reasons why you're wanting to explore these things. It could be something much deeper than just the physical enjoyment if those things happen. Maybe it's a memory of a. past experience? Or it could be something you've always wanted to do but fearful to do so. 

Open relationships for some people really work, including me. I've had one in the past that was incredible but we walked into our relationship both knowing we wanted to "play" with others. While together and even separately. Ours was the type of relationship we could talk about our hookups. Heck, we even had gang bang parties at our home for years. Friends with benefits would come over and we fuck like bunnies. For others open relationships can be a nightmare, and even the downfall of a relationship. Others are a "throuple" or a "more-some" relationships. But make the expectations, boundaries and what not clear from the get go. It's hard knowing what he is thinking if we don't ask. It could be he sees a serious relationship as something vastly different than you do.

If you're at the point where it really isn't working seek professional counseling as a couple and even individually. I'm no therapist. I'd go with somebody who is gay for therapy as they could have insight that you are looking for.

I'm not sure I helped, but I'm hoping at the least I got you to thinking... and that it leads to an open and honest conversation with your "Daddy".

Bodybuilder

I'm a bodybuilder. At 23, six feet, I have massive shoulders and hard pecs which taper down to a small waist. My real claim to fame however is my big bubble butt. It's not an easy feature to get, probably more genetics than anything, but I had one. Huge, hard, round, creamy white muscle. When I hit the stage you could hear gasps from the audience. I was naturally proud of it and loved showing it off, everywhere the better. I think almost any big bodybuilder, especially one who has competed like me, loves showing off. Being naked all the time was a huge turn on for me, I was a little bit of an exhibitionist. It came with the job.

One week Dad asked me to go work out with him. I'd just recently placed in a competition so I think maybe he wanted to show off his big son. I was game. It would be cool to watch my dad lift again since I hadn't really seen him work out in a while. Maybe I could show him some new tricks.

We went inside through all the basic equipment to the locker room in the back. The set up was pretty basic with rows of lockers and a steamroom behind a glass door. My dad was already wearing his work out gear but I brought stuff in my gym bag. I changed into my outfit and went to meet him.

"Rick what the fuck are you wearing?" he asked as soon as he saw me.

"What?" I responded. What was he talking about? I was wearing what every hot stud at my gym usually wore. I had on little shorts, okay really tiny, but I wanted to show off my prize winning ass! They were some kind of white lycra or something that clung tight like a second skin over my bubble. On top I had on a tank showing off my pecs. I mean I was pretty kind of new to the bodybuilding circuit so maybe it was too much? Of course Dad wore old sweat shorts that weren't anywhere as tight. Maybe a little snug in the crotch but good for dad. I knew he was gifted in that area, I'd seen him naked.

Dad ran a hand over my ass in the back, pulling down the bottom of the shorts like he wanted to cover me up but it wasn't going to happen. Finally he sighed and said let's go. He announced we were going to do legs so yeah, I know he wanted me to show off. We started with squats  which I knocked out easy reach time bending exposing more of my butt. When we got to the heavier weight, we spotted each other and really pushed ourselves. My Dad got behind me with his pecs against my back and arms around my chest and lowered with me while I'd push my ass out.

After a minute, two of Dad's gym pals came over to say hi. Sal was areal mountain; in his 40s with a moustache. He seemed intimidating. Dad's other pal Pete was thick all over with big beefy hands.

"Yo, what's up?" Sal said to Dad "Is this bring your kid to work day?

"I got to bring in my kid to make sure you guys keep up." Dad answered
laughing.

"Rick" Pete asked me "where are your pants? All you got is these panties huh?" He and Sal got a big chuckle out of that. "Turn around and show us what you aren't wearing." he laughed.

I did like he said, turning my back to them to show off my huge round bubblebutt. "Hey he likes to show off." Dad laughed. I really did and I stuck my muscles up and out to give them an eyeful of what a competition worthy ass really looks like. Sal reached over, grabbing the back of my shorts and pulling them deeper up my crack. "There ya go" he said "Now you've really got panties" and they laughed again. His fingers slid
down where the fabric squeezed between my cheeks until I swear one finger slid over my hole. "Damn" he said "No jockstrap or nothing huh?

"No sir" I answered "I don't want anything ruining the look." His finger was still sliding under the fabric where the cloth met under my ass. "I guess not" he said."Don't want to ruin that smooth skin." I looked back and he seemed pretty mesmerized by how muscular I was. It even looked like something was growing in his crotch but I guess feeling my shaved skin did that to him. They finally walked away but every now and then I'd see them looking over and talking about my muscles.

Dad and I continued to work out until one of the owners walked in and Dad wanted to go over and talk. "Rick, finish up and relax in the back. I'll be here" he told me. Sounded good. I went to my locker and peeled off my gear before throwing a small white towel around me and heading into the steam room. It wasn't fancy or big but the steam was calming so I sat on the tile seat and closed my eyes.

After a few minutes I heard the door open and Sal and Pete came in as well. Seeing them naked except for the small towels they were wearing was pretty eye opening. These guys were impressive. I hoped I could keep that kind of bod going when I hit 40. Sal sat next to me while Pete sat on the bench across.

"Hey Ricky" Sal said to me. No one really called me Ricky anymore and
it made me feel like a kid again. "Yes sir?" I answered.

"You hear that, Pete? Sir. Like I'm his dad." he laughed. I looked and Pete had a grin on his face while he was eying me. I knew he was checking out my body. It's what bodybuilders do, they're always looking at the competition. I was used to it and didn't mind. Besides he wasn't anything to sneeze at with huge pecs and thick biceps. His towel opened a bit and from what I could see he was pretty big all over.

"So Ricky" Sal said again "Your Dad says you're doing pretty good showing huh? I bet you are. Those are some impressive legs. And that ass. Damn. That's something."

"Thanks Sir." I replied. I was proud of my ass and knew it was an attention getter.

"Get up and show us some" Sal continued. "Show us what everyone's talking about."

It was just the three of us so I figured it couldn't hurt to show some
of my routine. So I stood and struck a few poses for them, turning my
back so they got a good view.

"Nah man" Pete spoke up. "Take off that towel so we can really see. Ain't nobody here but us right?I guess he had a point. I unwrapped the small towel and set it on the bench. Now I was totally naked and I knew they both had a good view of my body. I automatically stuck a few poses again to give them a show. "Damn, that's something" Sal said. He reached out and ran a hand over the top ridge of my butt. I didn't think much of it, like I said bodybuilders like checking other guys out. "Fuck that's so smooth too. You shave huh?" he asked.

I did shave, pretty much from my neck down. I didn't want any hair hiding my hard work. "Yes sir." I answered.

"Hey Pete" Sal said again "Come feel this." Pete moved to my other side, his hand joining Sals on my creamy white glutes. "Fuck, like a stripper" Pete said softly.

Sal's hand continued working over my round cheeks until it slid between them. "Even smooth here too huh?" he asked.

"Yes sir" I replied.

To be honest, now I was getting into the attention. Having two huge muscle studs appreciate my hard work felt great. Sal's hand moved lower until one finger rubbed over my hole. "Fuck yeah, even smooth here." he said in a low growl. I looked down to Sal's towel and could see this was having an effect. I guess all the talk about strippers was getting to him because there was a huge lump there. Fucking huge. I watched the towel spread farther until his semi hard cock was starting to stick up. I couldn't believe it, it looked to be about 9 inches of thick veiny dick with a fat mushroom head.

On the other side of me Pete moved his hand down with Sal's to my butthole and he was pulling it open and spreading the lips. I never really thought about my hole that much and was surprised at how amazing it felt. I closed my eyes at the wave of feelings and stuck my ass back, softly moaning from the sensation.

"Yeah, he likes that" Pete noticed. "I think we found some pussy."

I jolted when he said that, I never thought about my ass that way, but before I could think about it more Sal spit on my hole and gently pushed his finger in. Fuck, that felt amazing. I looked to his lap and his towel had completely fallen open, 9 inches of fat cock standing up and hitting his abs. He slid his finger deeper in my hole and I moaned again.

"Sounds like Ricky here likes his cunt played with, don't ya baby girl?" I looked to his handsome face in a daze from my feelings. I had no idea this was even possible. "You like two big men like your dad playing with that pussy?"

I felt confused but nodded and pushed my ass back further.

"Tell us princess, tell us what you like."

"I..I like you playing with my ass, sir."

"Your what?"

I knew what he wanted to hear and I didn't want him to stop so I answered. "My pussy. I love you playing with my pussy."

"There ya go" Sal answered. "Fucking huge muscle girl with a shaved little cunt. That's hot baby girl."

He pushed me to the tiled seat till I got up on my knees, my huge ass sticking behind me while my big pecs rested on the top bench. Pete stood and dropped his towel, all thick 9 inches of hard dick waving in the air from his muscled thighs. He got behind me, grabbing my ass cheeks and kneading them, pulling them apart while Sal slid his finger in and out of my tight hole. "Fuck Sal "Pete said "When was the last time you saw a smooth shaved snatch like this? Been a while huh?" As he talked he knelt behind me and got a good look at my hole.

"It has" Sal answered "Longer since I ate some pussy. How about you?"

I heard Pete hiss yes behind me before I felt wet lips on my hole. I looked and he'd pushed his face into my white bubble butt and his tongue drilled its way inside. Fuck, the feeling was amazing. I groaned from pleasure and couldn't help but push back to get more."Seems like he likes his cunt eaten" he said before he smashed his mouth back onto my hole.

Sal was watching his buddy eat me out while he stroked his fat cock in his lap. "Yeah he likes it. You like your pussy eaten don't you Rick?"

"Aww, yeah. Yes sir." I gasped out, lost in all the sensations flooding my head.

"Fucking hot. I knew you would the second I saw you. Big stud like you with all your big muscles but you're just a little musclegirl. You gonna be a hot cunt girl for your pals today?"

I still wasn't sure what he was talking about but I couldn't deny the feelings washing over me. I think at that point I would have said anything just to have them keep doing what they were doing. "Yes, yes sir." I finally gasped "I'll be your cunt girl."

"Fuck yeah." Sal responded as he stood. "Move over Pete, let me have a turn." Pete moved over and I was ready for Sal to start eating out my hole. I needed it now, I didn't care what they called it. However the next thing I felt seemed bigger than his tongue, a fat spongy knob pressed on my hole before my lips finally spread. I looked back at Sal pushing the first couple inches of his huge cock in my ass.

I wasn't sure what to expect. I felt full but it also didn't feel bad. He pushed further until about 8 inches of his dick was inside me. "FUCKKKK" he growled as he held it there. "Fucking sweet muscle cunt." He pushed again until his pubes pressed on my glutes. I was now kneeling in the sauna with a fat veiny 9 inches deep inside me, inside my pussy. He hit a spot that made me nuts and I moaned again. He started sliding
out but I didn't want that feeling to stop so I squeezed my ass muscles around his big cock.

"Damn, Pete, looks like we've got a live one. This is one hungry cunt."

I guess I was. I was a huge muscle stud naked in a gym steam room while two huge muscled dudes were fingering and filling my hole. My pussy. It was a whole new feeling making me nuts and wanting more. Sal was slowly sliding his thick 9 inches in and out of my pink hole, the fat head pulling out the smooth lips. I was squeezing his cock with my ass muscles and trying to pull him deeper and hit that spot i'd just discovered in my ass. His hard muscles slammed on my creamy bubble butt each time he shoved forward to fill me.

After a minute Pete was ready for some of my ass. Sal slowly pulled out and I couldn't believe how empty I felt. I looked back as Pete's huge body got behind me, ready to take over. "You want some of this big daddy dick in your cunt?" he asked me.

"Yeah I do" I gasped out as he squeezed the base of his veiny cock and made it thicken. He rubbed the head up and down my shaved hole while I moaned.

"Tell Daddy what you want" he demanded.

"I want your dick, Daddy." I moaned. "I want your fat cock inside my pussy." I saw him grin at my answer before he pushed and the head spread my pussy lips and popped inside. Damn it felt so good. I tried topush back for more but he held my ass cheeks and slowly pushed his way inside my cunt. His pubes finally hit my shaved lips as all 9 inches
buried deep inside my round creamy bubble. Sal moved around to sit on the bench in front of me and as I moaned he pushed his fat 10er inside my mouth. I'd never tasted a dick before but it felt so smooth and warm that I couldn't help but start sucking along with the cock plowing my hole. I was a fuck toy for both big men now, one end sucking and the other end taking fat cock deep in my pussy.

Sal put a a hand under my chin and raised my mouth full of his fat dick towards his face.I looked him in the eye as he watched me nurse his cock while he talked. "Yeah, look at that pretty face, those juicy lips wrapped about my veiny cock in your mouth. Does that taste good baby?" he asked me softly. I nodded as I kept nursing the thick head. "Fucking big muscle boy with a pretty face like a girl on this daddy dick. You
know what else you got like a pretty girl?" he asked. I wasn't sure so I shook my head. "You got a pretty smooth puss, baby. Such a sweet pink little cunt like a girl for big man dick. You know that?" I nodded. "Tell your daddy what you have." he said before he pulled the head of his dick out of my mouth. I looked up to him, overwhelmed by all the feelings of this hot stud in front of me while my hole was being pummeled by a huge thick cock. 

"I've got a pussy, daddy." I gasped out. "I've got a tight cunt for your dicks." He smiled down at me. 

"Yeah you do baby. You're always going to be a muscle cuntgirl now."

Pete was drilling me harder and I could tell he was getting close. I could actually feel his veiny 11 inches getting fatter inside me. I sucked on Sal's cock, moaning at the feelings inside my ass. I could tell I was close too.

"Tell us what you want, bitch." Pete said "Tell us what you are now."

"Fuck" I moaned out. "I'm a cunt. I'm your pussy girl for big cock. Fuck me, Daddy. Give me your jiz in my shaved cunt." I started to spasm, my asshole throbbing from the orgasm deep inside my big hard ass. Pete grabbed my waist and shoved forward, shooting his cum in me while Sal came as well, filling my virgin mouth with his thick sperm.

Sal and Pete finally climbed off me. Pete rubbed my ass, pushing his jizz deeper inside my hole. "Thanks, kid" he said before they both left. I sat dazed on the bench before I eventually left as well, quickly showering before I dressed and met Dad.

......

The next day I got out of the shower at home and was laying naked on my bed thinking about what happened. I slid a hand down my big bubble butt, fingering my ass lips. It had felt awesome but I needed to figure out how to handle my new feelings. Suddenly I heard a voice from the door.


"Dude. What's up? Dad and I are going to the gym. You coming?"

I look and it's Tom, my huge muscled brother standing in the door watching me play with my hole. I quickly pulled my hand away but he didn't seem phased at all. Tom was always my idol and an awesome big brother. While I was impressed by my dad's big muscles, I think Tom being a bodybuilder is what really got me into growing and competing. I
always told him everything and no matter what, he was understanding and supportive. One reason I loved him so much.

I ended up blurting out what happened at the gym, everything with Dad's friends, everything they said about my pussy, how they put their big dicks in my hole, and how amazing it felt. Tom listened to it all before chiming in.

"Well if it was awesome for you, why not? You feel you have this new sex organ, your pussy as you call it, and if it feels that great, go for it. Does this mean you're gay now?"

I thought about what he asked but I wasn't sure. "I don't know" I told him. "I'm not into going to some bar where a guy just wants to plug my asshole. I could get that anywhere. I want a musclestud like me who wants to put his big cock in a hungry cunt. It's different I guess. I'm a dude with huge muscles but have this part of me that's a pussy. Does that make sense?"

I realized I was still fingering my smooth puffy hole. Just talking about what I wanted got me hot. Tom obviously noticed as well.

"I guess so, bro. Looks like it's what makes you really happy." He focused on my fingers diddling my asslips and I saw a fat stick growing down one leg of his gym shorts. I couldn't help but show off, flexing my big arms as I pulled open my hole to show him some pink.

He walked over and sat next to me on the bed. "Can I touch it?" he asked. I moved my fingers away and he reached over and rubbed around the outside. "Fuck, dude. This really does feel like a soft pussy." Tom spit on his finger then pushed it in my hole, spreading the lips."Fucking muscle cunt."

"TOM? ARE YOU READY?" We suddenly heard Dad coming down the hall. Tom stood up quickly and I moved my hands away before Dad showed up in the door. "Rick, why are you naked? Aren't you going?" he asked.

"No Dad, Im just going to relax." I told him. I looked to Tom who had his hands in front of his shorts hiding his huge erection.

"Ok, whatever. C'mon Tom, let's go." he said to my brother before leaving for the car.

Tom walked over and rubbed my head. "Just know whatever happens, Bro, I'll always have your back." He gave a squeeze to his big hardon in his shorts and left. I  knew he meant it too.

......

Now I was by Tom's pool fingering my pussy again. I had hundreds of other experiences with studs. I was a bodybuilder with a shaved pussy, one that needed attention. Playing with it now outside by the pool felt great.

I heard my brother's car in the drive. "Hey bro, where are you. Dad went on home. It's just us. You still playing in your pussy?" I grabbed my dildo and sat on it wanting to be pre-stretched out for when my brother found me by the pool. I saw Tom out of the corner of my eye removing his t-shirt and gym shorts. "Mind if I replace that dildo."

Camping

Randy and I were eighteen. There were times when I dared to think I loved him. It was lust. In the summer we would sit, playing cards or checkers. I'd watch on the sly as the pink head of his dick poked through the bottom of his cutoffs as he free-balled all the time. I stored the sight away in my mind, as fuel for my fantasies. I could not tell him any of this. It seemed a risk too big to take. Life without his touch was hard, but life without his presence was unthinkable.

Try as I might to suppress it, the sight of him would always excite me. At the beach, I'd marvel at his muscles in motion. After a round of surfing, we'd drag ourselves back on the beach and soak in the warmth of the sun. I'd lie on my stomach while he'd lie on his back, eyes closed tightly. I used that precious little time to let my eyes drink him in. All of the little details were in the picture before me: the goosebumps sported by his deeply tanned skin; the heaving of his chest with each breath and the stretching his large round nipples under the strain; the blood pulsing through the veins in his neck; his baby fine hair wafting gently in the breeze; the pores in his skin and the fullness of his lips. His face looked so serene and inviting. I yearned to lay on top of him, to melt over him like butter in the sun.

     It wasn't until our annual camping trip, that I got the chance to drink him all in.  We were on a day hike when we saw the sign. "NUDITY ALLOWED."  We looked at each other and grinned. God, it was beautiful there.  A stream ballooned into a pool flanked by shrubs on one side and high cliffs on the other.We spotted several others as we walked each one more secluded and beautiful than the last. Finally, we found the perfect one.

     Not knowing how deep the water was, we stripped naked and wrapped everything in our towels.  Out into the water we waded like waiters carrying trays of food, we made our way to the opposite side.  Finally there, we climbed out of the cool water, and laid down on the warm rocks.  Nude, rolled on our sides, we discussed our good fortune.

     After a while we got out our ever-present Chinese checkers.  I longed to play with his dick, but at least I was able to let my eyes wander down to it. Previously shriveled by the coolness of the water, it had now begun to grow heavy.  If he knew I was staring he didn't let on, and after a while he drew one leg up, placing his foot on his knee.  His balls shifted in their loose sack.  Gravity seized them.  They rolled forward.  God, this had to be an invitation of some, but it was so subtle I couldn't be sure.


     We'd found an out-of-the-way place camp, Randy declared he didn't want to wear anything. I signaled my agreement. The night air made me acutely aware of our nakedness.  Not yet ready to sleep, we decided to play cards. The cards were dealt and a few rounds were played.  It was Randy's turn.  He started to chew on his lip in a way I understood all too well-- his turn was going to take a while.  He studied is cards.  I studied his dick.  The dancing firelight was hypnotic.

 "You going to play or what?"

 "Huh? God, please, help me now," I thought.

  "We're playing cards.  Remember?"

   "You were taking so long my mind wandered."  It was a feeble attempt to cover the truth.

   "Yeah, sure."

   There was the hint of a smile on his lips and a look of mischievousness in his eyes.  I was more relieved than hopeful, but still, maybe I'd misread him all these years.  We finished the game.

   "What do you want to do now?" he asked.  I always hated that
question.  Only one thing ever came immediately to mind.

 "It doesn't really matter."  I could dream about it, wish for it, but I couldn't bring myself to initiate it.  

"I'm beat from the all the walking we did today,"

 "Me too.  I could really use one of your backrubs...if you've got the energy for it."

 "Yeah, I could handle that." Back rub always translated to body massage.  It was the one intimacy that was allowed between us; a line we both walked up to without
hesitation, but never crossed.

"I've got some lotion with my stuff.  Could you rub some in? I think I overdid it in the sun today."

     "Sure, get comfortable.  I'll be right back."  As I returned to him I couldn't help but think that tonight was going to be a night for the truth.  We were both naked, he had caught me stealing peeks at his dick and was still willing to let me give him a massage.  This was either a demonstration of his trust, or a demonstration of his desire.

     I stood over him.  I'd seen this sight so many times in my dreams.  I knelt down and touched him.  It was no dream.  I squeezed some lotion into my hands and warmed it.  Starting at the calluses on the bottom of his feet, I began working my way up his legs.  His body relaxed.  As I felt the firmness of his muscles, I marveled at his strength and yet be so yielding to my hands.  I kneaded his thighs, but stopped at the start of his buttocks.

     In those moments his compliancy, he told me of the profound trust he had placed in me. The lotion imparted a sheen that reflected in the firelight.  Finally, my hands were on his ass. The twin muscular mounds exploded with goosebumps when I spread the lotion over them. This was the only place that was really sunburned and I gave it special attention. I kneaded his cheeks, watching them cleave in the process. He repositioned himself exposing his pucker. He was making himself more vulnerable!  I wanted to plunge in, to live my fantasy, but he was the love of my life, and I wanted to see his face.

     "Roll over Ran," I said gently. I gazed down upon him. His submission was unmistakable and undeniable.  Soon I became aware of the heat between us.  I'd already lost the battle against my erection and now I could feel a warmth--low and behind me.  I turned to look at his dick, filling with blood, pulsing, arching its way towards me.  His penis pressed hard against me.  The blood rushed into my groin and I began to weaken. Attempting to steady myself, he raised his hand, placed it on my shoulder, and slowly opened his eyes.

     "Come here," he said.

My ass pushed back against his cock, seeming to cradle it.  My own dicklette, roaring hard, was sandwiched by our warm, moist, lotion-lubricated stomachs.  My tongue met his. "My God," I thought.  "This is what it's like to kiss a man, to experience him with every sense there is."


"Up on your knees, Bud." I knew what was coming next.  He smeared the lotion in my ass and then popped a finger in my pussy. His finger moved deeper inside until it pressed upon my princess spot.  I felt the release of fluid rush down the length of my penis and out onto his stomach.  A moan escaped my mouth and I felt it reverberate in his chest.  I heard the squishy sound of lotion as he stroked himself to full hardness.

"Fuck me.  I've wanted it for so long," I confessed at last.

With one hand he pulled me forward against my weight; with the other he lined himself up to plug my anxious cunt. Then he eased me back against him.  I felt myself open up and then stretch wide as the head of his dick pushed through.  In startled reflex, my arms closed tightly around him.  We froze in gentle embrace until I could relax.  Gradually, more and more of his rod penetrated me.  My balls nestled into his cushiony pubic hair and I knew his dick was home.
    

 It had taken years to get this far.  I slowly sat up and looked at him.  Full and deep inside me, he opened those eyes and flashed a devilish grin.  I began to rock gently back and forth.  His chest rose, and with a low groan, fell.  Our lovemaking progressed by slow degrees, and as our movements became more pronounced, he reached out with his hand to me, first touching my dicklette, then encircling it.

We rapidly approached the flash point.  Our bodies glistened with sweat and our breathing had turned to panting.  When the action of his hand upon me became more frenetic, I knew I was on
the brink.

"I could do this all night, Ran, but if you keep that up I'm gonna cum!"

 "Shit, man, we will do it all night!  Nobody says you can only cum once a day.  Let it go!"

 So close to blowing my own wad, I turned my attention to him, wanting to bring him over the top with me.  I reached down and felt his shaft sliding in and out my pussy.  I slid my hand down and cupped his balls.  With my thumb, I pressed firmly where the spongy underside of his dick met his dancing nutsack.  His whole body tensed and froze.  I had gotten to his prostate the easy way.  He uttered no sound, inhaled no breath, made no movement. I gently squeezed his clutch of eggs, pushing him off the precipice, determined myself to follow him down.

 I felt the first spasm of his dick and the explosion in my cunt. That set me off.  My pussy contracted around him as he continued to pump into me.  We each fed off the orgasm of the other.  My churned cream shot out and landed on his tanned chest. A small pool formed in the hollow at the base of his neck.  The body that had been so at rest as I massaged it earlier was now unleashed, blasting its blueprint into me.  Wave after wave of convulsive contentment washed over us.  I collapsed against him, my semen serving as mortar, cementing our bodies together.  Under me I felt him shudder one last time.

     He made no effort to withdraw, but soon that terrific cock, which had been so hard for so long, began to deflate and, alas, slide out.

I straightened myself out beside him.  Toe to toe, and tongue to tongue, we intertwined our legs, kissed, and propped ourselves up on our elbows.  Neither of us said anything for a long, long time.  It was a magic moment; we were meshed together at the waist, but that didn't seem to matter.  We were meshed together in our minds.

Randy broke the spell.  "You think you could go for round two?"  What a grin he was wearing!

What happens when you are no longer with your Daddy/Husband? (EDITED)

 What happens when you are no longer with your Daddy/Husband?

I've really wanted to do this post for awhile now, but fear has stood in my way. I guess fear of being to vulnerable. To honest. To open and I think deep down feeling too needy. But not anymore. I wanted to have an honest conversation with all of you, my faithful readers about my first-hand experience the last two years after losing my husband of 18 years on July 29th, 2021. Daddy Jim and I were together eighteen years. The last two of it in hospice in our home. It wasn't easy, but now those last two years are the ones that mean the most to me.

Prior to that, eight years before (for a total of 10 years) we didn't have sex as his prostate had been shaved as it had grown enlarged and needed to be treated. It also made his erections impossible and once that happened he lost interest physically as well as sexually. It also meant he lost interest romantically too, again not ideal but we made it work. Not ideal, but it was what it was. We also grew to the point where we shared different bedrooms as:

 1. I was sleeping better alone.

2. It gave me time to use my dildo's. Again maybe being too honest here but it's the truth. Without his sexual interest & being in a monogamous relationship I had to have some kind of outlet.

You may be asking yourself why did I even stay. Simple, I loved him and I still do even though he's been gone two years. We had too much time together to throw it all away, and all we had was each other as neither of us had family that talked to us; and I still don't. I learned all too brutally that after my mother dying before I lost my husband that she was the "glue" that made my immediate family polite... with her death the true feelings of hatred came out. Besides there were other ways in which I could serve, some of which I mention in my interview here: https://thatsmrfaggot2you.blogspot.com/2021/08/my-interview-with-hierarchypcast.html

Cooking, cleaning, shopping, housework, entertaining our friends, and loving him the best way I knew how including keeping him at home like he wanted as he got worse physically. He was 79 years old when he died. I was just 55; and no matter how much you think you're prepared for someone who's very ill to die you never are. It was both an incredible loss and a relief to see his suffering stop I went from being a suburban Stepford boi-wife to widow over night. Years of turning to someone for advice to not having that at all. That's been one of the harder things these last two years. I never made big decisions without his advice or input and losing that was an impossible thing to move beyond even though I was forced to make gigantic decisions all alone. Decisions I had never made before. Doing things like get my first apartment on my own in my own name and doing it 55 years old. It was an impossible hurdle filled with so many doubts about so many things... including did I even do the right thing. The struggling was believing in myself and still is,  I was just dependent on having his advice and input for everything. In some ways that dependency was way too much because a lot of the time I felt frozen in fear and doubt. Doubt still sucks the very life out of me...not that there is much of a life without him. Work, eat sleep and repeat.

The other is that in 18 years time I've grown "older", dating has changed so much I don't recognize the scene anymore. It seems strangers in gay bars don't talk like we used to. We certainly don't dance like we used too either... at least here in Cleveland anyway. Gone from being needed by somebody to not feeling needed by anyone. It seems like everyone is on there phone texting someone or doing lord knows what.

The nights I do go out, which is rarely, I'm barely ever approached and somebody is talking to me first. That alone has me questioning everything about myself. Including my own appeal as I wrote about for the first time maybe three weeks ago. Am I even desirable in the first place? Can I find another long-term committed relationship with another loving man?

The "dating apps" or "hookup sites" 90% of the time at least for me don't lead anywhere and most of the times even the atmosphere of the baths in my opinion have changed. Guys even there are on their phones trying to lure someone outside of the baths to come to the baths to have sex when years ago you had sex with who was there. But then again I'm not in my early twenties like I was when  was going a lot. I rarely go now and 90%... again nothing happens. It seems at times nobody at the baths has sex any more which I find baffling. Maybe it's just a Cleveland thing or that the facility here is so big 98% of the time... no matter how many people are there... it seems empty.

There are so many things that I write about here and in my stories that just don't seem important anymore: like pussy training. Dildo play is nice, don't get me wrong here but it does grow old quickly... or at least has for me.  It also seems like why even bother doing pussy training at all... because it seems nobody wants it to begin with... or maybe it's just my perception. Now granted when people I work with said... "there is some truth to perception" and that comment was not related to anything I'm saying here in anyway but hearing that statement still didn't help my outlook on things. Because if that statement is true, then there is some truth to my perceptions... or could it be I'm throwing off that vibe? 

Granted somethings I just can't  let go of: like shower shot-ing out. I don't feel like myself if I'm not doing it at least every other day and I guess it's because I've done it for so long I don't feel "normal" if I don't. I feel irritable, bloated and just like "bleeck"if I don't. Somethings I would like to explore, like chastity, but what's the point if I have to hold the keys myself and only answer to myself. It doesn't seem worth the trouble now.

It's the "being of service" to men I miss most. I feel like I'm of no service to anyone including the people I work for or the customers we encounter everyday with what I do in my working life. It's the feeling not attractive.. not only physically but sexually as well. It's the feeling of not accomplishing anything worth while. It's the feeling of not being bred I miss most. The satisfaction that comes from knowing that by being bred you were/are "a good piece of pussy". And when it's gone you feel a sense of loss of not being good at anything. For me it's like I've lost my sense of purpose.

It seems very cruel to me to know fully that I thrive being of service, of being pussy for a man, that my pussy is my only sex organ then not be able to be pussy for men is beyond daunting. Or has it reached that point where it is all just ending anyway; and because of my age? Is 57 just to old to draw, attract anyone for anything or is it just the dynamic that has changed and I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time

I'm not really complaining here, it's just honest opinion, honest questions and sheer curiosity. The whole thing has me very depressed and very unfulfilled, and I feel like I can't be the only one going through this. If you are going through this as you're reading this, please leave a comment about how it's affecting you and what you do to currently combat it.

Currently, I'm not combating it....

Abe's Present

I was at my best friends house. He was throwing a birthday party in honor of my 18th. Several hours into the evening, his big brother, John, grabbed me and took me up to his room to receive my personal present from him. As soon as we entered he closed and locked the door, leaving me speechless and just the tiniest bit confused. He then grabbed me roughly, ripped of my clothes, and pushed me to my knees before he got naked as well.

“I have watched you grow up since you were eight years old. Playing "house"with my little bro as "his wife" in our sisters apron. Having sleepovers where I heard him fuck you for the very first time. Goofing around while we all skinny dipped on those weekend camping trips just "us guys" and again heard him fucking you. Checking me out every single chance you got. You are old enough now, it’s time for you to become MY dick sucking cum whore you were born to be.”

"What about your brother? I'm in love with him."

"He was just helping me get you ready for ME! Don't believe me. Ak him yourself."

Just then Henry walked out of the bathroom fully clothed.  "Sorry, Abe. It's true. It's George that's in love with you. Not me. George knew he couldn't do anything till today, your eighteenth birthday, but he wanted you fully trained before then to take on the role of his lover."

Crying all I could ask was, "Why?"

"He offered to pay my way through college. He. really does love you. Way more than you could ever realize."

"This true, George?"

"It is. Deeply." He pulled out a Tiffany's blue box. I really began to cry then. "Abe, darling don't cry. Just do Daddy two small favors."

"What are they George?"

"Say yes and present your pussy to Daddy."

I spun around on the carpet, bent over, raised my ass high in the air, spread my legs wide and flashed George the pussy he deserved.

What's H-happening

“What’s h-happening?!” he shuddered beneath you. His locked lil dicklette leaking pre-cum between your bodies.

Shot after shot of thick cum flooded into your father, and he was powerless to stop it. In a couple of seconds, he wouldn’t even want it to.

“Shhhh, princess” you offered him one of your pits, letting your pheromones do the talking.

Pretty soon he was lapping away, quivering as waves of ecstasy flooded his newly softened brain. You just kept cumming deep in his pussy, letting nature take its natural course of action. He’d be knocked up soon, his body constantly craving your dick to feed the pregnancy.

“You’re welcome, Dad” you whispered, enjoying his pussygasms milking all the cum out of you, “I’ll let you thank me with round two later. After all we're here camping all week. Hope you're ready for a really sore & mpreg pussy, cause that's my plan.”

Let Me Do All The Work

 That's it... Just keep your hands on the wall, baby.

Uhh...Uhh... I'm... Oh God! I'm getting close... I can... I can feel something almost like a buzzing on the underside of my dick.

Oh, baby... you know, we've talked about that. You don't have a dick. You got a boy-clit.

UNGH! UNGH! Yeah... UNGH! You're right. I'm so sorry. I meant to say I got a buzzing on the underside of my boy-clit... UNGH! AHH!! JESUS CHRIST, I'M SO CLOSE!!

Yeah, baby. That's it. You just keep your hands off that clit and let me do all the work... But damn, your pussy is getting me close too!

UNGH! Oh God! UNGH! But what if you cum before I do?!

Well then, I'll just put your chastity cage back on and we'll try again later this week.

Oh my God! UNGH! UNGH! PLEASE! I don't think I can take that... AHH!! FUCK!! AHH!! FUCK!! AHH!! FUCK!! This is the third time you've fucked me since I agreed to let you try to teach me how to have a hands-free orgasm... UNGH!! UNGH!! OH GOD!! AHH!! FUCK!!

And you just keep getting closer and closer, boy... YEAH... AWW... SHIT, THAT PUSSY'S GONNA MAKE ME CUM!! AHH!! AHH!! ERRAAAGGHH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!! UNGH!!

WHOO-WHEEE!!

Damn you got a nice pussy, boy!

But... But I didn't cum, again!

Like I said, we'll try again later this week... WHOO! JEEZ! That was a good nut! Damn! Anyways, like maybe after I get home tomorrow we can try again. Now, c'mon... Hold still so I can get your cage back on...